Wednesday, October 27, 2010

Oh, Wind - How I Love Thee

Have you ever told your kids that everything will be all right and that they shouldn't be scared, but you yourself are completely freaked out and wished someone was there to comfort you??  So here's the deal:  The Minneapolis area is and was experiencing category 3 hurricane force winds right now and last night - for real.  As the windows were rattling, fan vents were slapping open and shut, and an occasional pumpkin from the front entrance kept rolling and bumping into the front door, I was putting my kids to bed last night.  Both were a bit wound up and scared of the wind... I was too, but I calmly tucked them into their beds (one slept on the floor of the other one's room) and told them not to worry.   I would be right here and I would protect them.
As soon as their lights were out, I quickly turned tail and scrambled into my own room into the safety of my bed and turned on the weather channel.  The verdict: it's windy.  It will continue into the next day until the evening.  Great.  Soon, I heard slumbering snores from down the hallway.  Good, they're asleep.  I think.  I was all alone.  Just me and the wind... and ten hours of infomercials because I was too afraid to go to sleep.  I dozed in and out of the Snuggy Macarena, the Food Dehydrator, and Shoes Under.  My half dreams were filled with scenes of the guy who plays the role of "Mayhem" for an insurance company commercial and that crazy ding-a-ling woman who's always giving obvious advice to idiots on a different insurance commercial.  Whoosh, bang, roar... whoosh, bang, roar... and so the night continued.
Finally, the morning came... phew.  My nine year old rushed into my room already dressed and prepared for school - he wanted to know if he could go outside and play...?  Sure, if you consider playing in a vortex a good time...great idea.  So he ran downstairs, threw on his winter clothes, and he was out the back door in 2 minutes flat.  Me?  I was still peeking through my wooden blinds taking stock of all the presumed damage I was hearing all night.  This is what I heard next:
"MOM!!  We're missing a pipe!"
"What?"
"You know that white thing that goes down the side and sticks out of the house a long ways?"
"...yes?"
"That!  It's gone!  I can't find it anywhere!  Do we need it?"
"I would think so... let me see."
On further inspection, I can see that indeed our downspout has gone missing.  And now it's beginning to rain... cats and dogs... super.
"I'll go find it, Mom!  I'm taking Maya with me... she might be able to help!" (The dutiful six year old manned up and followed without question.)
"Okay."
Now, I am standing in the doorway to the garage, the wind is still whipping around at gale force speeds, and it appears as though I have let my nine year old take over the reins - and now he is comforting me
"I FOUND IT!!!"
Turns out, the downspout had jumped a fence and taken up residence under our neighbor's deck. 
"Mom, I will just put it in the garage and maybe I can figure out a way to put it back on after school!"  Either I have raised very self-sufficient children, or I'm a big, fat, frady cat and they know it - guess I'm not fooling anyone with my calm delivery of the "I will protect you" speech. 

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