Monday, September 13, 2010

Do you want to play a game?

Hey, Mom! Come over to the island, I have a great game we can play - I made it up!  (I should have slowly stepped away and excused myself when I heard the words: minotaur, laser cannons, and the Wizard.)

This is all you have to do, Mom:  See these guys over here?  They protect the Minotaur because he's evil and he wants to destroy the world of Jokertow. 

Jokertow?  Did you mean Jokertown?

No, Mom.  Just listen.


First, you have to get your strategy.  This is a strategy game - you know, like Stratego - the one you never win.  See how these guys are made up of three parts?  Each time they get blasted, they lose a life - one of their parts.

How come my guy only has two parts?

Mom, they are called "lives."  Anyway, you have to get your laser cannons and shoot over to these guys unless they block you with this special Lego with the red piece on top.

Do I have one of those?

No.  Mom, just listen and stop asking questions!  Now, here's the cool part.  If the minotaur gets free, use this piece to call  up the Wizard, and the he will use his laser tank bombers to destroy the Minotaur's weapons.

Do I have a special wizard phone too?

What?  There's no phone, Mom.  You don't get this do you?  Here, just use this (he hands me a piece of breakfast cereal that's been left behind) to block the laser nets.

Laser nets?  What are those for?

Mom, please - they are for the gargoyles that live over in this cave.

Am I on your team or we against each other trying to defeat minotaurs, gargoyles and laser tank bombs?

What?  Where's Maya?  She will know what to do.

Are you saying, I'm too dumb to understand your game?

No, Mom - it's just that Maya will understand.  She just plays and doesn't ask all these questions.  You are making my head hurt.

Sorry.  Do you still want to play?  I'll just do what you do.

No, I'm kind of tired of this game.  You can just go.

I go upstairs to make my bed and get a load of laundry going and this is what I hear downstairs:

"Maya take this guy - and I will take this guy and then we can use these for lasers to shoot the Minotaur. KaPOW!  YESSS!  We got him!  OK, get on the earth ship - the soldiers are hungry!  Neeeroooooom, pashoooo, kashooooo.  We've landed safely.  Mom so doesn't get this - she just kept on asking me questions and stuff."
"I know, Joe - she does the same thing to me when we're reading - it's like she thinks she is our teacher or something..."

Oh... guess I'll just go back to being the housekeeper.

1 comment:

  1. This is hilarious! Tales from real life . . . . Thanks for sharing it. Oh, and I wish I had a housekeeper ;)