E-readers and Chairs and Orcas - Oh, no!

I've officially reached a new low.  Let's not even bother with the fact that yesterday I had to change the font size for my entire computer to "large" because at the ripe old age of 41, I can no longer see "medium."  But today was a showstopper.  I spent exactly 3 hours trying to download a recently purchased e-book to my e-reader.  I am not embarrassed to admit there were tears, some gnashing of teeth - OK, a lot, and an almost constant stream of really inappropriate words - I might have made a sailor blush. 
And then there's the office chair.  The one I'm sitting in right now.  Comfortable... swivels... has soft armrests.  But somewhere between Thanksgiving's lonely can of ReddiWhip in the fridge and New Year's fancy finger food fiesta - the mechanism that adjusts the height of the chair has gradually "weakened."  Hmmm... so, now at the end of even the quickest of sessions with my computer, my knees are slowly striking up a friendship with my chin.
So is this what lies ahead from now on?  Diminished eye sight paired with two-year-old temper tantrums - finished off with a desperate hunt for the Land's End Miracle Swim Suit each spring?  Pretty soon, I'll be drinkin' something out of a brown paper sack and petting cats that aren't there.
Oh, yeah, and I woke up this morning from a dream where I was about to be swallowed- lock, stock and barrel by an orca whale that was "walking" upright on its tail flipper while carrying a tiny umbrella and singing show tunes.
The silver lining today?  I'm not sure I can think of one, but maybe a little sage advice instead:  Do not get old... or avoid going to sleep with the Free Movies channel left on all night...